Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Poor Cecelia Gimenez!

Hey guys, I have been wanting to share my latest art project with you.

I was thinking that I couldn't and would need to wait, but as I thought about it I really couldn't come up with any ways this would negatively impact me.  I just want to share this with you all because it makes me smile every day.  It seemed unfair that I would be denying smiles and laughter to everyone by not letting them see this.

I have taken my lemons and made the most delicious lemonade that anyone has ever tasted!

First I should say that it is no secret that I am in the middle of divorce proceedings.  Anyone that knows my name can look me up in the states court system on the internet and see my name and what I have a scheduled court date for.

It is also no secret that I find the destroyed fresco hilarious...so what am I getting ready to reveal?

Well, here is a cropped image of the final piece you will see further down the page.
Fantastic right?  Oh wait - were you thinking: "What's the big deal?  So you made an ugly painting."  
This is NOT just any ugly painting.  I painted over an otherwise now useless picture that no one wanted.

My wedding photo package contained two canvas prints.  I did not want them but to get all the proofs and the digital prints, I had to take these ginormous pieces to display the moment in museum form forever.

This one was the largest one.  Freaking 20x30!  Bleh!  Who wants a picture that large of yourself anyway even if your marriage lasts forever and ever?  I sent this one home with my mother to display.  It has been in her house where I have not had to look at it.

My child had never seen the original and when seeing this completed masterpiece exclaimed, "Wook Mommy, it's a prince and a queen!"   Is it sad that the only way I look like a queen is as a monkey face abomination through the eyes of a 3 year old?

So if you have a large canvas print that celebrates something that doesn't need to be celebrated anymore, this could be an option for you.

I will tell you I broke out in fits of laughter as I worked on this.  It only took seconds for things to be destroyed.  Overall I spent under two hours on this and at one point I thought to myself "I just cannot get the face to look right" and that thought resulted in tear-streaming laughter.  Why?  Because that is what I imagine was going through the head of Cecilia Gimenez.

Seriously, I feel really bad for Cecila Gimenez.  It really didn't take long to make something pretty into something ugly.

TADAAAAAA!
I give you "Ecce Homo et Sponsam"  !!!
(I relied on Google Translator on this one but I hope it means "Behold, Man and Bride" in Latin)
I hung this up in my bedroom and it makes me smile and/or laugh every single time I look at it.  The original picture did not do that for anyone.

I know you are wanting a before picture, but as I am working on this blog I realize that something happened to the "good" before picture so you are left with these two crappy ones.  Sorry.
You can see that it was an actual photograph (my fat arms and all) printed on canvas.

I think someday I will figure out how to mount this canvas and add a crazy fancy frame to it...and a brass name plate.  I think that will add the utterly ridiculous finishing touch that it deserves.

I mentioned above that the package contained two canvas prints...stay tuned.  I hope to have another fabulous solution soon.  I have ideas and sketches floating around.  One involves a unicorn, rainbow, disco ball, and lasers.  I know, WTF right?

I would like to end this blog post thanking Cecelia Gimenez for her artistic contribution to the world.  It has brought me so much joy and laughter and inspired me to create my own piece of happiness.